Yesterday me and Adam played at the playground like we did before Operation Mongoose. It was nice to play on the swings and the seesaw again.
He said Hey Keisha. I said Hey Adam. He said Have you been practicing your magic? I said yes. Adam said Has Willy been bothering you lately? I said No he doesn’t know I’m there and he doesn’t care. I wanted to be happy but saying it out loud made me sad but I was a big girl this time and I didn’t cry. Adam said Good I don’t like it when he hurts you.
Then Adam said Hey Keisha. I said What? He said Do you miss your mother? I said Yes all the time. He said What if you had all the magic in the world would you use it to get her back? I said I want that more than anything how come you asking me these funny questions Adam?
Adam said Remember when you asked about my mother and father? I said You said it’s complicated maybe later. He said If I tell you a really big secret do you promise not to tell anybody? I said Sure. He said I mean it Keisha you can’t tell anybody. I said OK.
We sat down on a bench. Adam had his hands in his pockets and looked real long at his shoelaces. Then he said What if I told you that I’m not like other boys? I said I know that’s why you’re my best friend. He said No not like that I mean what if I said that I’m not really a boy at all just something that looks like a boy? I didn’t know what to say so I didn’t say nothing. Adam said Keisha there’s a reason why we can only meet here or at our secret place. I said How come? He said It’s because I’m not human. I said Then what are you? He said It’s hard to explain. I said Can you try please for me?
Adam licked his lips and swallowed like he just ate some ice cream. I thought about Henry waving at me when he saw me when he was at the ice cream place with the new sheriff who had all that long gold hair like Rapunzel. She said Who’s that Henry? Then he said A friend from school. She said You’re making a lot of friends these days. Then he said We need all the help we can get. Then for a minute I think I saw Adam in Henry’s clothes like I did in my dream but I blink and he’s just regular Henry. I still got cold all over.
I hear Adam call my name and I’m back at the playground. Adam said You know how I told you that a big part of magic is wanting something real bad? I said Yes. Then Adam said Well sometimes people want something real bad but they don’t know what it is and their want gets so big that it makes magic. I nod my head to let him know I understand. Then Adam said That’s what happened with my mom and dad. I said How? Adam said They had a big empty thing inside and it made them really sad so magic helped them make me. I said Why you don’t live with them? He said They are not together. I know some kids in my class who have moms and dads who are not together. Sometimes they live with just their mom or their dad and sometimes they go back and forth from mom and dad. I like the second one. I hate it with just Willy. I wish it was just you and me.
Almost like he heard my wish in my head Adam said I knew you would understand I’m so glad I picked you to be my friend. I smiled because I like it when he said things like that. I said So you need me to help you find your mama what about your dad? He said My dad don’t want me I hate him. I feel sad when he said that because I know what he mean. I said That’s what Operation Mongoose is for isn’t it to help you find your mama. Adam said Yes and the good news is that we already found her. I said We did who is it?
Adam opened his red jacket and took out a piece of paper. It was the picture I made in my sleep. The one that looked like the lady in my dream who looks like Henry’s mom who is the Evil Queen in the land of fairy tales. I said Hey that’s my picture you keep it in your jacket? Adam said Of course. Then I said So this makes Henry your brother don’t it I wish I had a brother.
Adam made a mean face. He said He is not my brother. Then I said But Henry’s mama is your mama too but before I can finish Adam said He is not her son. I said Why do you hate Henry he’s real nice. Adam said Because she was mine before she was his. I said But people don’t belong to other people they belong to themselves. Adam said What the f-word do you know you’re just a stupid little girl. And he pushed me on the ground and disappeared. Just like that. He was there one minute then I blinked and he was gone.
Last night I dreamed of a dark dark place and a baby crying. It had no words but I can hear I want I want I want.